Keep on writing you're just raping yourself (nothing can take my mind away from them)
Don't you ask about me, ask 'bout somebody else (Once I've fallen there's many stories to tell)
I can feel it, won't embrace it, it's overwhelming how far you take it (Stuck in a state of questioning)
And don't you tell me you know we're destined, you won't convince me, I won't listen (Resentment building, you've put our lives on hold)

Trashed and scattered again, I'm feelin' so low
You waste your breath while fuckin' with me, my blood is so cold
My destination always unknown, I'll find my way there
But goddamn motherfuckers always wasting my time

I won't be the victim, but the first to cast a stone
Sedated nights to the bar room fights as metropolis takes its toll
And don't you try to stop me, it's a place you'll never know
Don't try to judge or take shots at me, I'll never let you seize control

Play your game you better walk away cause your integrity don't mean shit
Crawl on me you fucking parasite, and I'm gonna take you out

Label me, that's fine, I'll be somebody else (Nothing in front of me but holes ahead)
Lie about my life, have a story to tell (Lights went down, was on the edge and I fell)
Oh you're so insightful, let me remind you to twist and break me, should make you worried (Long way to go and you're right there)
Two-faced liar, don't try and know me, deceit brings fire, makes sure you can't breathe (Pick at pieces of my body below)

I never bothered with all the rumors, too much garbage (all the same)
(I know my destination)
I'll stand right here, come on you falsehood deceitful liar (There's no shame)
Don't ever take my side, I know you're never right, I'll justify the means (Nothing's what it seems)
I'll stand around and fight, but there's no point tonight, been chained to this machine
Trashed and scattered again, I'm feelin' so low
You waste your breath while fuckin' with me, my blood is so cold
My destination always is known, I'll find my way there
But Goddamn Imposter are you out of your mind?

I walk down these roads alone and now you're seen here
My feelings that I'm having towards you are perfectly clear (I control this ride)
My devils appetite is tonight and now I'm alright
But you Goddamn Motherfuckers always wasting my time

Play your game you better walk away cause your integrity don't mean shit
Crawl on me you fucking parasite, and I'm gonna take you out

I won't be the victim, but the first to cast a stone
Sedated nights to the bar room fights as metropolis takes its toll
And don't you try to stop me, it's a place you'll never know
Don't try to judge or take shots at me, I'll never let you seize control

Don' try and get the best of me (No one can help but your own self)
City makes my body ache (Lonely, don't try and prey on me)
I feel your world dying, no more use in tryin'

And my body's trashed and low, but to you I'll never show myself or what's inside
And I've seen it all before and I'll settle the score, I'll never join your side

woooooooo hooooooooo!!!

Anyway guys,

i found out

if i cross my eyes and switch it back,

Everything looks sharper!!!

REALLY. Go try it!:DDD

And yknow,

my fingertips have been feeling weird for days.

I think its the freezing weather in Shanghai..

They feel things weirdly.

Like, things feel smooth.

My mum says its bad blood circulation(:

Ah welllll.

And i woke up this morning

Ive decided, for now that

Im tired of sinking myself in loving.

For all this time

All that mattered was my love

All that i thought about

All i felt, my love

Was all

I realise, I miss friendship

I havent felt it throughly in ages

Ever since

2006

Our clique.

...

Manda's my bestie

But it feels like ive never had fun with her and LS for a long time.

...

Caitlin's just made of pure, fluffy, Awesomeness

But ive yet to send her the letter i was supposed to send.

...

I HAVENT SEEN JACQ IN AGES

she's just living a few blocks away.

All i wanted to talk about

was meandher herandme

and me

and her

It feels like ive been wearing an upside down brown paper bag

with cut out hearts for eyes

and hand cuffs around my arms and shoelaces

Im tired

All i ever wanted was good friends

And i threw myself into love

I cant see how i could carry on harriet.

Im sorry, but thats what i feel now

You made me think

and realise

But your love is too much me to take

I need you

- your friendship

Im sinking in this relationship

I miss back then

But i need what it was like of way before

best friends

idk

*

Sigh.

This is a Mess,

haha.

12:17 PM